Chase... it was cancer...

[tollermom]

Finally got the myasthenia gravis test results back, almost three weeks after they were sent in and a week after Chase died. Test was positive, not that that was a surprise, given that he'd responded to the pyridostigmine.

The necropsy results also came back today, and the root cause of all of the recent problems was cancer. Specifically, hemangiosarcoma... and it was pretty widespread... it showed up in every sample they tested other than the lymph node. No large tumors were evident, though, which explains why nothing showed up on xray or ultrasound (and we were looking... his spleen was specifically checked in early January.

Ultimately, it's not something that could have been cured, and any attempt probably would have just made him miserable and prolonged the inevitable. I think he fought to stay for as long as he could, bouncing back from the pneumonia and the myasthenia gravis, but in the end, his body just gave out.

Dammit... I'd just managed to go a whole day without spontaneously breaking down crying, and now it's started all over again.

*sigh*

Comments

[kychilehead.livejournal.com]

Give grief a voice, Debbie. He was an incredible dog and eventually they will get to happy tears. It's one week shy of six months since I lost Blade and not a week goes by that I don't break down. And sometimes it's a few times a week. They take a huge part of us with them and it's hard to heal from.

I sometimes wonder if I should have checked into what took Blade from me even though it wouldn't have changed the results. They tell me I did everything I could and if it was the same type of cancer, I couldn't have prevented it or saved him even though I seem to think I have that power.

I can sit here and say think about the good times the last 14 years but I know every memory, every photo, every thought may trigger tears. I know it's so difficult. Take comfort in Drummer and Thunder, Cookie has become a rock for me during the healing. I don't know that I'll ever heal because Blade was my canine soulmate.

I just want you to know you're not alone. I know it feels like it because we all have special connections to our furry friend and we all deal with it differently, but I do feel your pain.

(on another note, a vet friend of mine sent me "Goodbye, Friend: Healing Wisdom for Anyone Who Has Ever Lost a Pet" by Gary Kowalski. It really helped just to "know."

*hugs*